Tuesday, June 14, 2011

We have a lot to give and a lot to learn

I know all pregnant women especially for their first pregnancy, go through a series of questions, slight paranoia and loss of control like I have. It doesn't matter if you're a young new mom still working on a career and living under someone else's roof, or whether you're a top working professional, age 30 and you think you have it all. When it comes to babies, no one can ever have full control or ever prepare enough before, during and after. And this is perfectly alright.

For example, I never thought I'd be able to decide on one doctor, or one midwide, or one hospital of MY choice. How about the prenatal vitamins?! The clinic told me to go on Materna, my friend said the Equate version (which I use), and another said don't do it or you'll stay constipated. "What the heck is Folic Acid?!" People were saying "You will know, it's your choice." "What do you mean its my choice? I need YOU to tell me, I've never done this before!!" 

I turned to my best friends, my mom, the internet, my pr friends and a doula (thanks Natasha!) and in the end, I did make MY own choices. I made most of them within a week of finding out I was pregnant, which is pretty damn good . Looking back I know I could have saved some stress for Phil and I if I knew then what I've discovered now. I still haven't landed a family doctor, but we have the greatest midwife in the world. I'm sure all you women with midwives feel the same way, and that's okay, we're allowed to boast :)  

Another example is when we were chosing room colours. I've had white walls and wallpaper chosen for me my entire life. Next thing you know we're chosing colours! I'm and a black and white Chanel kinda girl! I lost sleep over the fact that I'd have coloured walls. Then one day at work I was daydreaming like pregnant people do and I told Phil how about green and brown and he said I was thinking the same. We're set.

It just goes to show that with time, everything falls into place. Although nine months never seems like enough time (especially when some of us find out it's usually past the nine month mark), you're always more than ready for the moment you hold your baby. It's human instinct. Try finding a pregnant influence in your life whether it's your dog, doula, mother or celebrity. If they can do it so can you!

A lot of people were concerned that I was worried about planning a baby shower after my last post. I mean, c'mon first time moms, you want to buy baby things and you're told to wait until a baby shower?! Who's controlling this?! Not you and it feels fregan scary. I got texts, calls, facebook msgs and e-mails. I love you all for reaching out!

The truth is I was honestly more concerned about planning the next few months with and without my love and I needed to write it all out. Baby showers are cute, short and sweet. Nothing to stress about but for now, because people have been asking me who,when and where, I had to be honest and say I have no fregan idea. And that's okay, the time will come.

As a PR and event coordinator I should know that the planning of an event can start months and advance, but it really comes down to the last week leading up to it. Or worse- the last 12 hours!

We need to remember that we're alll doing our best to prepare during our pregnancy, but the reason we have week by week studies of our baby, and appointments spread out throughout the entire nine months is so show us that it's a natural growing process. Just like our baby, we're growing and learning too, and we don't need to rush them or hurt ourselves to be the perfectly ready parent and have the perfectly set home. 

We're having a baby because we have a lot to give and a lot to learn (Kelly Cutrone, If you have to cry go outside)http://www.harpercollins.com/books/If-You-Have-Cry-Go-Outside/?isbn=9780061930935

I hope this post convinces women pregnant or not, to take 3 big belly breaths and smile. Right now. Do it.

One day at a time.

Xxo take your own advice PR MOM

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